It has been four days since Smeagol died. Things are easier but I still can’t get through half a day without crying.
I became a bit obsessed over the weekend with writing my tribute blog to Smeagol. I stayed up well into the night each night, writing whatever memories of Smeagol came to mind. I dragged out boxes and rifled through my belongings in an effort to find every photo of Smeagol that I could find. I couldn’t concentrate on studying or much of anything for that matter until the blog was written, photos were scanned, and it was all put together and published. It was a rather cathartic process that leaves me feeling better.
The best thing about this weekend was the enormous amount of support and caring I received from family and friends across the board. A simple note from various sources meant the world to me. The sharing of grief helped me bear it more easily. It is soothing to know that others recognize my pain as real and valid, and that they understand it.
This is the first time in my life that I have lost someone close to me. The process of grieving has been and still is painful, but I feel well-equipped to look ahead and move on from this.
Thank you everyone.
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